when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Randomize
