I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize
