She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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