I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
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