I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
Randomize
