There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
