he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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