I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
