Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Randomize
