It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
