wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize
