I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
I CAN MOONWALK!
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
