I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize
