He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Let's get the cat blown out
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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