Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
