Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
we're so committed to being not committed
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
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