butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
