so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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