Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
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