We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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