everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
