no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Do vagina's smell?
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize
