hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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