who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
im holly from the hills drunk
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
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