He is such a slut. More and more my type.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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