do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Randomize
