Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Randomize
