There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
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