Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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