Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
Just cropdusted the office
it was like his penis was on wheels.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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