you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
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