super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Randomize
