Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
