Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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