I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Randomize
