i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Randomize
