dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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