Grow some girl-balls and come out already
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
pray to the hookup gods
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
