What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize
