Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Randomize
