just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
im calling her cock vulture from now on
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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