Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
