Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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