your room smells of hookers.
And success
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
