i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
