kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
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