They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
He literally asked permission to hit on me
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