Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Randomize
