Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
