he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Randomize
